Well, there I was … in a classroom … in an FBI facility … in the middle of West Virginia.

Would you believe I was there on purpose!  Not too many people can say that, but it’s true.

There I was … with a buddy of mine … in that classroom … with 32 of West Virginia’s finest looking back at us!

We were there without handcuffs, warrants for our arrest, or even any moonshine!  (Although, at that moment I could have used a little.)

Funny thing is, while there someone did ask about my marriage to my second cousin. 

I remember thinking that I’d hoped our kids looked like her side of the family, mainly because my side isn’t the most pleasing to the eye.  Since then we’ve wound up with two handsome little boys, and wouldn’t you know it, one looks just like her little brother and the other is a splitting image of her daddy!  I couldn’t be happier!

But that’s not why we were in that classroom that fateful day. 

It was March 2009.  I was working in computers, my buddy in training, we were trying hoping to get some equipment hooked up to the internet, and that equipment needed to go in that very classroom. 

With that equipment being deemed essential, it couldn’t wait and we had to take a look … the sooner, the better!

We met up at the classroom just after 10:00 that morning and when we looked through the window, we found it was packed!  Packed with those 32 West Virginian’s I’d mentioned a few moments ago, and it looked like our trip was coming to a quick end … until the door opened.

“This is the newcomer’s brief.  The person scheduled for 10:00 hasn’t made it yet.  If you’d like to take a quick look, go right ahead!”

So, we looked at one another and headed through the door.  Before I knew it, my buddy dove headlong under the desk and all I could do was stand there and watch!

I started to get a little self-conscious as my buddy mooned those 32 West Virginians.  About the time it crossed my mind a full set of teeth was looking back at me, I realized that I should something!

“Good afternoon!” I started.  “My name is Lee and I would like to welcome you to the FBI.  I understand that someone was slated to be here at 10:00, and unfortunately neither of us are that person.  I was sitting in those seats about a year and a half ago, and during that time I’ve been pleasantly surprised. This beautiful facility is the home to an incredible mission and is staffed by a great bunch of people.  I’m truly glad I took this job.  I’m almost certain that in eighteen months that you too will say the same thing.

About that time my friend pulled himself out from under the desk, jumped to his feet, and gave a big sigh.

“Did you find it?” I asked.

“Nope,” he replied.  “We’re going to have to come back when we have more time.”  He turned on his heel and headed out the door, leaving me momentarily by myself, so I quickly turned to the group one last time.

“Ladies and Gentlemen,” I began.  “Once again congratulations and welcome!  I hope you enjoy the rest of your day and I look forward to seeing you around campus!”  I then followed my friend out the door.  We had a quick discussion on that connection while standing in the hallway, planned on coming back later in the week, and went our separate ways.

With lunch the next thing on my mind, the scene then left my mind almost as quickly as it occurred.  I didn’t think about it again until the next morning when I came back to work.

I barely got to my cubicle when another coworker approached.

“Hey, were you in one of the classrooms yesterday morning?”

“I sure was, why do you ask?”

“Well, my brother just started with the FBI and was in that room when you walked in.  Not only did he say it was the best impromptu speech he’s ever heard, but he thinks he may know your second cousin!”

Would you believe me if I told you my two young boys are willing to leave the house, parting from their electronics, and go romping through the woods? Not only that, but they’re doing it willingly!!!!

I know this sounds too good to be true, but to paraphrase the philosopher Kurt Angle who once said, “It true! Oh yes, it’s true!” But this wasn’t always the case.

We’ve never had much of a problem with our 6-year-old. He does love his TV and video games, and loves the outdoors, but more times than not, he won’t suggest it himself. Generally someone else has got to make the recommendation.

Our 8-year-old is a different story. I’ve come to believe that he’s allergic to the fresh air, and acts as thought he would die without his electronics. When he does leave the home willingly, a playground is usually involved.

However, that has recently changed. These two are not only willingly leaving the house, and running around the woods, but are asking to go out on their own! What changed you may ask? Well, I’m glad you did and I’m about to tell you!

A couple weeks ago I was about to take-off for my afternoon run, jog, walk, or whatever you call it, when my youngest asked to go along. I knew he couldn’t go as far as I wanted to, so an idea come to mind. Years ago a coworker introduced to Geocaching.

For those who are not familiar with the term, Geocaching is an online, GPS based scavenger hunt, with hides all over the world. There just happened to be a “kid friendly” hide in the park between our home and their school that I hadn’t found, so I told him there was something I wanted to look for and could use the help. My wife then pressed the older to go along … and off we went!

The boys were highly intrigued by this new found “treasure”. After we examined the cache and signed the log, they wanted to keep going. While this extended hike was unexpected, it wasn’t long before we found ourselves in the field behind their school.

They didn’t recognize it at first, but a group of kids playing T-Ball caught their attention.

As we continued on, it finally clicked, “This is our school!! Did you know there was another way to get to our school!!!” Though I did, I didn’t want to destroy the moment, and let them continue to explore! Their excitement was just contagious!

When we finally returned to the house, this adventure was all they would talk about! They spent much of the evening telling Mom, every little detail of what took place!

After work the next day Aimee told me that their “adventure” was all they would talk about. My youngest finally asked, “Dad, can we go on another adventure and find more treasures?!” How could I say no to that?!

“You want to do what?” I asked.

“We want to take our bikes down the trail we went on before!” We had taken bikes down that trail a month or so prior and my eldest seemed more interested in complaining about the outdoors than riding a bike, and now he was asking to do it again? On his own?

So, off we went, I with little hope this would be a good idea, but I was happily surprised. We went about a mile and a half round trip, and if it weren’t for the time, I believe we would have gone a whole lot further!

The fact that these kids are asking to go outside is a minor miracle! My boys are now willing to leave the electronics behind, go outside creating memories, and I’m not going to complain!

TFTC! (Thanks For The Cache!)

In September 2005, I turned 35. For my birthday the US Air Force gave me a gift. They gave me round trip tickets for a 130-day vacation to the sunny resort of Kuwait City, Kuwait!

Well, it wasn’t actually a vacation, unless you consider working 13 hour days, every day of the week, for 125 days straight, a vacation! But then again, this trip turned out to be the most incredible experience of my 23 year military career … outside of marrying my wife and adopting my two boys of course!

While the war in Iraq raged a mere hour’s drive to the north, my tour was extremely cushy compared to my peers, and I really didn’t feel as though I was in a war zone. For instance, I lived in a hotel, had a food allowance, and my own rental car. Few others could say the same.

Our base was a significant location for the throughput of supplies and personnel between American sites in Europe, Iraq and Afghanistan, which at that point of time, made us quite busy. When I left my home station, I understood that I would be an Executive Officer, which in the Air Force is an aid to the Commander. But upon arrival, the Commander told me I wouldn’t be doing traditional “Exec” duties, but instead, I’d responsible for supporting Coalition Forces and Distinguished Visitors that passed through.

The reason for this was because we didn’t have a “Protocol Officer” that would normally fill this role, and if he were to pick up this duty, he would never be able to do his own job … that being, the actual management of supplies and personnel as they traversed into the war zone or out.

The first couple of days I was awestruck. But with the number of Colonels, Generals, Admirals, Members of Congress, Senators, Governors, Japanese, South Korean’s, Italians, Australians, and who knows who else I forgot, it didn’t take long for this young Captain’s head to swell, swell, swell!

Not only did I quickly come to understand the importance of this role. I quickly realized I had pull! I’d become the person who could get things done! I was the guy to go to! There was nothing I could do wrong, and nothing could change my mind. My air of self-importance continued to grow until another Captain set me straight.

Jay Johnson was that Captain. He was a member of the Texas Air National Guard, the Chief of Aircraft Maintenance there in Kuwait, and the happiest-go-lucky person I’d ever met. Apparently he’d taken notice of my “air of superiority”, and was going to do something about it. Even if he didn’t take notice, or consciously take it upon himself to knock me down a notch, he did it anyway.

In many ways, it was needed. I had taken a liking to my situation and my new “sphere of influence”, I had let it go to my head. Even with the Iraqi border just a stone’s throw away, the area was in a state of relative peace. In my egocentric mind, the entire “Global War on Terror” was still an event that was somehow “over there.” At home I’d watched the news, I’d heard coworkers talk about their own deployments, and I’d even seen the damage done to the Pentagon on 9/11. But to me, at that time it still seemed to be a story … a story I was emotionally disconnected from.

It was here that Jay found me. He would change my entire life, with an announcement over the intercom, “Angel Ceremony, 20 minutes, runway T2.”

Such announcements were regular occurrences, and I paid little attention until Jay brought it up.

“I never see you at those ceremonies, why don’t you ever come?” he asked

“What are they?” I replied.

“What do you mean, ‘What are they?'”

“I’ve been too busy, especially for something that happens almost every day. What are they?” I asked again.

“I’m not telling you”, was all he would say.

“So, let me get this straight. These ceremonies take place almost daily, I know nothing about them, you’re not going to tell me what they’re about, and you believe I need to take time out to attend?”

“Yep.”

“Maybe some time, but not now. I’ve got too much going on.”

“Okay,” he replied. He then turned and walked away.

I thought that was the end of it, but that wouldn’t be the case. The next day, the same announcement again, “Angel Ceremony, 20 minutes, runway T2.”

Jay and I happened to be in the same area once again when the call came about. “Hey Lee, ya coming?”

“Nope … busy.”

“Okay,”

This conversation found a way to repeat itself for several days. He’d invite, I’d decline, we’d go our separate ways, and admittedly, I was getting a little upset. Then one day he asked, “What have you got going on that makes you so busy, that you cannot attend one, short ceremony?”

I proceeded to rattle off my schedule for that day, and Jay gave a smile suggesting that he could see through my bluff.

“Man, you are busy!” he replied with a grin, turned, and walked off. That only upset me a little more!

The next day, the repeated itself, and I finally spoke up, “Jay, if I go to one of these ceremonies, will you get off my back?!”

He looked as though I caught him off guard, thought for a moment and replied, “Yeah.”

“You promise? You’ll get off my case.”

“Lee, if you attend just one, I won’t pester you again.”

And like before, we went our separate ways.

About 8:30 the next morning, the call went out, “Angel Ceremony, 20 minutes, runway T2.”

But this time … I was in luck … or so I thought. I was the only one in the office and had to meet some Embassy folks at 9:00. Even if Jay was around, there wasn’t enough time.

Then, my phone began to ring. I looked at the Caller ID and saw that it was Jay. He may get me next time, but not this time!

“Good morning Jay!”

“Good morning Lee, did you hear the announcement?”

“I sure did, but I can’t make it.”

“Why not?”

“I’ve got to meet some Embassy folks at one of the gates at 9:00.”

“Which gate?”

“The one near the pizza place”

“Cool, it’s right next to T2, you’ll have plenty of time.”

Seriously? I mean, seriously?

“Jay, let me get this straight. It’s 8:30, the plane is supposed to be parked in 20 minutes, and I’ve got to be at the gate at 9:00. That would give me 10 minutes for a ceremony and get to the gate, no matter how close it is. Do you really think I’ve got time for some ceremony and get to the gate?”

“Yeah,” he replied. “There’s no set-up, no tear down, and they take about 5 minutes. You may even have enough time to grab a pizza.”

I thought about it for a moment and decided I’d give it a try. If this occurred like he claimed, at least he’d get off my back!

“Jay, I’ll show up, but if things get running behind, I’ll have to take off.”

“Understood, if you have to leave, I’ll pester you with the next one.”

“I’m sure you will!” I replied. “You do remember promising that you’d stop pestering me if I go.”

“Lee, if you make the ceremony, I’ll keep to it. I’ll meet you at the gate in 15 minutes.”

All I could do was sit there and stew. I can’t believe I let him talk me into this, but he did, and I really wanted to get him off my case. So I took a moment to gather what I needed for the 9:00 and headed out the door.

A few minutes later I found myself parked at the gate and walking to the flight line. I found Jay walking my way, smiling ear to ear.

“Well, here I am!” I said. He nodded quietly, putting a finger to his lips as though he wanted me to be quiet myself.

“Huh?” I asked. He put his finger to his lips again, indicating that I need to be quiet. But again, I spoke.

“This thing has got to be quick …” I began, but this time he was more forceful. This time I took the hint, looked at the clock on the phone and continued to wait.

A minute or two later, a C-130 landed and taxied over to where we were. When parked and the propellers came to a stop, Jay started toward the rear of the aircraft, motioning me to follow. It was then that I noticed our group quietly coming out of the woodwork and numbered about 20. We lined up in two rows at the aircraft, one on either side facing inward.

Jay stood at the front of the left column and indicated that I stand at his side. As the flight crew opened the ramp, I gave Jay a nudge and pointed to the clock on my phone … 8:50 AM … right on time. He quietly indicated that I should be patient.

About that time something attracted my attention. I turned to see a small truck had backed to the end of our column. I watched the driver, a Soldier, step out. He opened the rear doors to reveal that it was empty.

At the same time, six Marines entered our ranks, lining up in two rows of three at the back of the truck, facing one another.

As the driver latched the doors, with the Marines in place, the Soldier took his spot beside one of the doors and gave a nod.

With a quiet voice, one of the Marines called, “Detail … attention!!” With that, the entire group stood to.

“Aircraft, face!”, the Marines turned in unison toward the C-130.

As they did, Jay called, “Parade … rest!” The two columns of Airmen followed suit.

“Forward … march!” called the Marine, the six marching in unison toward the aircraft, slowly making their way inside.

During all of this, I found myself impatient. I had just a couple minutes to for my next appointment, but here I stood. Stuck, and hoping this group would pick up the pace.

“Detail … halt!” was called. “Center … face!”

Still impatient, unable to see inside, I could only wonder what they were now facing. “Come on guys!” I thought. “I’ve got to go!”

“Ready … lift!” I wondered what they were picking up, but really didn’t care.

“Detail … attention!” Jay called out. The two columns and the Soldier by the truck all came to.

“Rear … face!” was called from within.

“Present … arms!” called Jay. All but the Soldier rendered a salute, I still hoping this ceremony would come to a quick end.

“Forward … march!” was called, the rhythmic step of boots was heard on the metal floor, and the Marines now began their exit, I hoping we were about to conclude.

And then, … it happened. I saw the boots of the first two Marines start down the ramp. From where I stood, I could only see up to their knees at first, followed by stripes of red and white, the second pair of Marines, followed by a field of blue filled with stars. Then the third pair.

As they slowly marched by, I finally hit me what was taking place. Emotion swept through my being as I struggled to keep my bearing.

“Who is that?” I wondered. “What happened? Where are they from? Does their family know? Are they married? Do they have kids? Siblings? Parents? What were they like? What did they like? What were their hopes and dreams?”

The questions continued as the Marines made their way towards the truck … a truck I then understood belonged to Mortuary Affairs … the group that would help that poor soul … that Fallen Angel … make their last trip home.

It was in that moment that I really understood the gravity of this Global War on Terror. It was not a story, it was not a movie, it was real. It was something that was occurring at that very point in time, just a few short miles away. That could be any one of us covered by that beautiful American flag, carried by those six young Marines, as we made our final trip home.

“Detail … halt!” called the Marine. “Center … face! Ready … lift!” The casket was then lifted to meet the floor of the empty bay. Then they paused.

The Soldier marched slowly, yet purposefully, to the end of the casket. He aided the Marines in guiding this Fallen Angel inside.

As the Soldier passed each pair of Marines, they would drop their arms and come to the position of attention.

Once inside, the Soldier paced backwards, until he was beyond the Marines, and stopped … coming to attention himself.

“Detail … present arms!!!” the Soldier called. For a brief moment, we stood in silence. All at attention. All saluting. Showing respect for the to this poor young soul.

While we stood only for a moment, it felt like an eternity. The entire time my eyes welled up with tears, thinking of this young man or woman, their family back home, and that had just happened. I came to really understand, to appreciate, the sacrifices of those who came before, and were sure to follow. I came to think of my own service and what it really meant. I thought about my own family and what would happen to them, if that were me in that truck.

“Order … arms!” the Soldier called. All present dropped their salute. “Detail … dis-missed!”

At that, all turned on their heels, stepping off to continue with their days.

All … but one.

I remained, still barely at attention, my hand still hung in the air trying to hold a salute, … watching … just watching … as the Soldier closed those doors and began to drive away.

As he did, I felt a touch on my back. I turned to see my friend.

“Thank you for coming,” he said with a smile, and headed off to work himself.

I’d looked at my watch and still had a couple minutes to walk those 50 yards or so to the gate. As I did, I’d thought about what had just happened. An experience that changed my life forever.

The last thing that came to my mind as I approached the gate, watching my visitors approach the other side, was Jay’s promise to never ask again. He kept that promise, never asked again, and never had to. I made every ceremony I could from that moment on, leading a couple ceremonies myself. Showing the due respect for all Fallen Angels who came before and have come since. I’m certain that we wouldn’t be able to live the lives we do if it weren’t for their sacrifices.

Thank you, thank you all.

Four years ago, Jacob Ezekiel Proctor joined our family.  May 14, 2018 was his “Gotcha Day”.  It was that day where our little family, along with Jacobs older brother Noah, became whole.

Our travel to China during this trip had similarities, and differences, to the trip to meet Noah.  Similarities included our trip to Tiananmen Square and the Great Wall.  Differences included a trip to Nanning and a ride on the “bullet train” through some of the most unique mountain terrain I’ve ever seen and wondering through the city of Guangzhou via subway for a “retirement party for one” at an Irish pub called Hooley’s.

We recall him singing familiar lullabies in Mandarin upon arriving home, for comfort we’re sure.

We recall his first visits to family in Colorado and Virginia.

We recall the first pictures, the games, the toys, and stuffed animals he hugged for comfort.

We also recall climbing on the furniture, getting in trouble at school, and continual picking on his brother!

He has been all boy, happy-go-lucky, and a true blessing to the entire family!

Jacob, we realize you are likely the only person who had NO say in this entire process, but thank you for being our son!  We love you!

It has been said that the little things in life are what really matters. It doesn’t take long for some such memories to come to mind, and just a little longer for the flood gates to open! For our family, there are more than a few…

We remember our first home in Colorado Springs, which we still rent out today. We were fortunate to have a garage and a fenced back yard for Gracie to play.

It was also here where someone broke in while we were out and placed Gracie outside. Oddly, nothing else was removed from the home, but there were signs that someone was there, and we believe we may have scared them off. We weren’t sure if we should call the police, or laugh at poor Gracie who failed miserably as a guard dog!

While we used this home as a base to explore Appalachia, the threat of losing power was present every time a storm rolled through! But fortunately, there was a Wal-Mart a half mile away … in a straight line.

We could see the main entrance from our porch, but being West Virginia, the drive was just about three miles away, with a one-lane tunnel under the interstate along the way!

Whatever those little things are for you, don’t ever let them go. Ours have helped us get through the hard times, better enjoy the good, and we’re sure those little things in others lives serve the same role.

I never realized how much I could love someone until I met my wife. We didn’t realize how much we could love another until we had children. There is something about those kids, so genuine, so innocent, so dependent.

This is something we think about every single day, and we would do anything for them to ensure they have whatever they need to grow, thrive, and survive.

One of the most significant things we do for them involves our youngest, who requires a blood transfusion once every four weeks.

For the most part, these trips have become father / son days where we spend time reading and doing art projects, or playing games and watching videos on a tablet.

The day continued without much of a second thought. The process went smoothly, we watched videos and played with slime, with the anticipation of a car wash on the way home sitting in the back of our minds. Overall, this was a great day and looked to be a great finish!

Once the transfusion was complete, we packed up our belongings, hopped in the car, and headed off to clean up the car. Unfortunately, fate had other plans.

He proceeded to open the bag, poured everything on the back seat, and grabbed what he wanted.

He then mentioned something and I thought he was finished, so I reached toward the backseat and he handed me the bag, with what I imagined would be the rest.

While that wasn’t quite as traumatic as helping his constipated brother in the Air and Space Museum a few years earlier, it was close. But, I was impressed by the fact that a six-year-old had the foresight to empty a bag prior to throwing up!

I set the bag on the passenger side floor, rolled down his window, and said, “We’re out of bags. If you need to throw up again, please throw up out the window!”

So, as my stress level continued to rise, I called my better half, and unfortunately, she didn’t answer, which really didn’t help my thoroughly happy mood!

Aimee finally called to see where we were and it was obvious that she hadn’t heard my message … so I put her on speakerphone and proceeded to fill her in.

But now, with our lives returned to normal, I went to go clean the car … which included the food, laptop, slime, and the bag filled with puke.

And if at some point in the future they find themselves reading this post, I want them to know that we love them! I’m proud of them and we’ll always be there for them … puke in our hands and all!

Over time I’ve asked friends, family, and coworkers, “What would it take for you to walk off your job?”  Or, if walking off is too extreme, “What would it take for you to give your boss your two weeks notice?”  Or, “If you returned home this evening and were presented with something … a phone call, a piece of mail, a package, anything … that would cause you to give your boss your two weeks notice, what would that be?”

Unfortunately, most respond with a new job offer, found out that they’ve won the lottery, or were retirement eligible.  All of these are legitimate answers, and very safe especially when folks have responsibilities such as a spouse, kids, mortgages, and the like.

But what else is there to life? What types of things are being put off due to the time constraints associated with a job? Vacations? Kids T-Ball game? A second honeymoon? A pet project?

What is it that keeps us at the job we’re in, what is being missed along the way, and what is the threshold where we just say, “Nah, this is too much! I’ve sacrificed (fill in the blank) way too much,” and then do something about it?

Unfortunately, there are more than enough times over the past 40 years where I have pushed aside my hopes and dreams for jobs that don’t seem to matter.  But due to the fact that I still need to be the “responsible adult” and provide for my family, my dreams are set aside, and never get readdressed.  Maybe soon I will find a way where I can make those dreams a reality and politely walk away.

The closest I’ve come was after college when I was still moving furniture.  Two of us were in the waiting area about noon one beautiful Friday when the Dispatcher approached us with two small jobs.  The first was slated to take two to three hours.  The Dispatcher handed us the paperwork and held onto the second set of paperwork, just in case someone else came back early enough to run with it.

The two of us took off and returned about 3:00 and proceeded to check in.  The second job hadn’t been filled and the boss was waiting for us.  So my partner went to take care of the truck while I went to take care of the paperwork and pick up the second set.

As I stepped into the waiting room I saw a good friend about to leave for the day.

No sooner did I hit the parking lot, but my co-worker had pulled the truck around to the front.  He immediately noticed something was missing.

“Where’s the second set of paperwork?”

“With the Dispatcher,” I replied.

“Why?  Weren’t you supposed to be returning the paperwork from the first job and picking up the paperwork for the second?”

“Yep.  I dropped off the first set of paperwork, but I’m going fishing.”

It was nothing against my co-worker, and I do hope the job was taken care of.  But, I’m surprised I wasn’t fired!

Have you ever just walked off a job?  If so, why? If not, what’s the closest you’ve come?  Please, tell me the story!

For those who have adopted, or have been adopted, they know these children have two special days … a birthday and a “Gotcha Day”. A Gotcha Day is the day an adopted child enters his or her adoptive family. Today is my oldest sons “Gotcha Day”.

Getting to that point was quite the challenge. There were background checks, getting matched, working with Immigration for citizenship, working with the State Department for Noah’s Visa, working with the Chinese Consulate for our Visas, working with the Chinese for finalizing the adoption, working with a travel agency for arrangements, and lastly, working with a lawyer in the US to complete his adoption with an American birth certificate.

But when all was complete, we were able to bring him home. While there have been challenges along the way, Aimee and I have been blessed to be part of his life and have him as part of ours.